Gees that was a world wind show! I felt like I was on that journey around the world in 80 days - except it was 11 minutes before I could get on the show.
I have no idea what went wrong. I called in as a host as usual 10 minutes before the scheduled time, so that I can chat with the guest and ensure that all sound levels are working fine. My guest came on as the show began, as the start up music finished I realized I had a problem when my guest could not hear me. I then kept asking if anyone in the chat room could hear and there was a resounding no. The chat room had listeners, there were callers on the phone lines.
There was no phone line in the room where I normally host my show, I ran to grab my techie son to see if he could fix the headphones or figure out why I could not be heard. My second son had driven off with my cell in the car. My brilliant daughter made the suggestion to take my computer into my bedroom so that I could use the phone line there. I am so thrilled someone could think in the midst of the panic. I realized what do I have to lose, I am already off air and I have already lost 2o minutes into the show. So grabbed all the plugs and ran up the stairs to replug the computer, call my guest to let her know to try again, and then call back into the show and “VOILA” - an Empowering Space.
So the show was about the Power of the Journey -Are you enjoying the ride? I can honestly say in those 20 minutes I was not. Yet when I listened to the archive, you could hear me in the begining then I evaporated. From the moment I got on to the show I felt like I could breathe again. Aaaaaaaaaah! I could exhale.
I had planned the trip so well, everything was organized packed and ready to go, I did not plan for flat tires, running out of gas, and a detour. My nature is such that I will not quit or give up once I have made a commitment.
So this was just another example of how I have grown for the year - I would have been devastated a year ago, when things went wrong, and in front of people. Now I realize there are certain things I have no control over, and no matter what happens they are all just experiences. It’s how I perceive them that makes the difference. I have learned to be humble and let go of shame, the overwhelming sense that who I am is not good enough. My imperfections are all part of being human and these in themselves are all perfect to help me learn and grow and stretch myself. There is nothing to fear, I can allow myself to be open and vulnerable.
I have challenged myself in areas I would not have even tried before, public speaking, facilitating workshops, designing workshops, networking with people I would have never dreamed of approaching, gees not to forget the radio show, so that whatever I do on the air cannot be reversed or wiped away. Living life live and direct.
I have also challenged myself by having to face my demons, my shadows. Learning to embrace all of who I am. Realizing in my strengths are all of my weaknesses and in all of my weakness my potential strengths. Learning to back down and not needing to take a conflict all the way to the end, to engage in the drama, to feed fuel to the flame. I can now catch myself and be an observer of the experience and my feelings, to really discern what I am feeling, to understand where those feelings are coming from.
How I have learned and how I have changed this year?
- I have learned to communicate from the heart and to speak my truth without hesitation.
- I have opened myself to receive this year, be it acknowledgements, gifts of gratitude, kind and loving words.
- I have opened myself to making new connections, networking and making new friends around the world.
- I am opening myself to teaching and coaching globally through teleclasses, workshops and radio
- I am stretching, and expanding, moving forward and challenging myself to feel the fear and do it anyway.
- I have discovered some of my core passions that guide me in life - connecting, communicating with people, being of service, assisting others in being a true expression of who they are.
- I have developed an attitude of gratitude, curiousity, awe, playfulness and joy.
What are three things I am grateful for this year?
The love of my husband, the wonderful kids that we have and having them all home for Christmas, trusting my intuion, challenging myself, connecting with all my listeners and their encouraging feedback, the amazing guests that have appeared on my radio show, my daughter’s help to do the Christmas shopping, all my friends that no matter how far apart we are are always in my heart. Okay I was never good at math, I’m sure I crossed three.
Please feel free to add your comments and answer these questions.
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